depleting her entire bank account to give birth to her daughter.
Yet the reality of becoming pregnant as a single lesbian was something Chin approached pragmatically and without idealizing the reality of motherhood.
“The idea of pregnancy is this glorious wonderful thing and women are glowing. Your body is expanding to 2-3 times its width, stretched beyond capacity… I don’t understand why it is we think about the process of pregnancy and motherhood as a monolith… I’ve felt more joy than I’ve felt in my entire life being this kid’s mom but I’ve also felt great despair and loneliness and sadness and removal from my life before.”
Mother and Daughter: Pro-Choice and Taking Up Space
Even though Chin has said she loves being a mother, she does not think her choice is one every woman should make. She is quick to say that being a mother has changed her, but her stance on reproductive rights remains the same.
“I thought that getting pregnant would make me unsure about being pro-choice, but having gone through the pregnancy, I’m so completely convicted with the notion that women should have a choice,” she said. “No one should be forced into the uncomfortable life-changing body snatching process of pregnancy. If you don’t want to you shouldn’t have it. It’s such an invasive process. If that pregnancy comes with motherhood… to give up 20 years of that time to care for a kid – that’s an unreasonable ask even if you believe that whatever is growing inside of me also has a right to survive. That right to survive does not trump my rights.”
If anything, Chin said becoming a mother has only enhanced her awareness.
“I’m surprised that more has not been written about this relationship where both of you are at the mercy of the patriarchy and pitted against each other in this misogynist anti-feminist way. Friendships between women are not explored in a real way. You see all kind of friendships between white men and black men, brothers, people who work in an office, in a basketball team… It stands to reason that they don’t think women are that important. How many stories do you
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