So let's just get right to the point: The upcoming Cats movie is going to be absolutely batshi* bonkers crazypants wackadoodly-doo insane. That's it. That could be the whole article.
But the details are too good not to obsess over, so here we go!
So okay: This week in Vegas, CinemaCon took place, which is the annual convention for movie theater owners where movie studios present their upcoming rosters. Universal presented Cats, and while it didn't present any actual footage, it presented plenty of details that are just full-tilt batshi* crazy.
To set the stage, let's remember that the cast includes A-listers like Idris Elba and Taylor Swift, divas like Jennifer Hudson, and full-on legends Ian McKellen and Judi Dench. So this is a legit film, not some rinky-dink Mamma Mia kind of popcorn musical.
So how is Universal and Tom Hooper doing this? Dame Judi in cat makeup? Ohhh no. Hooper is using CGI motion capture to turn Dame Judi into a digital cat.
Please read that sentence again.
Then, he is shooting the entire film on GIANT sets with GIANT set pieces so that Dame Judi will be the size of an actual cat and what is going on?!?!
RECEIVING WORD VIA MULTIPLE SOURCES THAT THE CATS IN THE MOVIE VERSION OF CATS ARE THE SIZE OF ACTUAL CATS. I'M NOT… https://t.co/3M8MshuPFD— Mitra Jouhari (@Mitra Jouhari)1554318521.0
Plus, the whole thing will be shot from the perspective of an actual cat.
I promised Cats and we got Cats! A behind the scenes reel as there’s no finished footage. We did learn it’s largel… https://t.co/gCSzydAy3R— Germain Lussier (@Germain Lussier)1554317741.0
Dame Judi Dench is going to be crawling around like a computer version of your mom's cat Whiskers. As James Corden, who also stars in the film, helpfully described it:
“These are people, but they’re cats, and it’s kind of blowing my mind.”
That sentence means nothing and makes no sense and what is this movie and we LITERALLY CANNOT WAIT.
Moving on! How is Hooper going to make sure Dame Judi really looks like a cat? Why, "digital fur technology," of course.
What the ever-loving hell is digital fur technology? Who knows, but according to Hooper, it "create[s] the most perfect covering of fur.” Sure okay!
Also? Everyone took this all VERY seriously. As Vanity Fair reported, in the video that Universal presented, Dench said:
“We spent a very very long time preparing how to be a cat.”
And Idris Elba added that the linchpin to his performance was figuring out how to view the world from “the cat perspective.”
ARE TICKETS AVAILABLE FOR PURCHASE YET?
No trailer for CATS, but a behind-the-scenes clip -- including Idris Elba talking about looking at the world throug… https://t.co/mGBiSF8dWh— Barry Hertz (@Barry Hertz)1554317640.0
Naturally, people of the internet are losing their entire minds:
Behind the scenes footage of CATS reveals all the sets are gigantic, filled with oversized furniture and doorways a… https://t.co/EIT95WpZEi— Visionary Director Scott Wampler™ (@Visionary Director Scott Wampler™)1554317584.0
The characters in the Cats movie will be done via mo-cap not makeup 🙀 I’m going to rename it Andrew Lloyd Webber’s Avatar— Jim Vejvoda (@Jim Vejvoda)1554317656.0
This is my Mueller report. https://t.co/KL4KC779fD— Louis All Is Calm, All Is Bright-zman (@Louis All Is Calm, All Is Bright-zman)1554317820.0
The Cats movie as made with the latest in cutting-edge mo-cat technology. https://t.co/eMnZrY6bFE— Matt Singer (@Matt Singer)1554317823.0
Everything I'm learning about CATS has absolutely ruined my day in the best way— Esther Zuckerman (@Esther Zuckerman)1554317579.0
I will be on the subway tonight, turning to random people, and saying "DID YOU KNOW THAT TOM HOOPER IS MAKING THE C… https://t.co/mZUlrOgslw— Esther Zuckerman (@Esther Zuckerman)1554317614.0
Wait: Jennifer Hudson just came out and sang "Memories" and maybe now I'm a CATS fan?? Very confusing morning over here. #CinemaCon— Barry Hertz (@Barry Hertz)1554318009.0
CATS footage just blew the roof off #CinemaCon2019. Trailer should be online shortly so I don’t want to say too muc… https://t.co/kQivR3HbdC— Ben Mekler (@Ben Mekler)1554317478.0
As expected, the CATS first look is stunning. #CinemaCon2019 #Cats https://t.co/a0N8VldG30— Erik Anderson (@Erik Anderson)1554318993.0
America watching Tom Hooper’s CATS https://t.co/dwvLXZc7un— david ehrlich (@david ehrlich)1554319585.0
BREAKING: Universal has released this exclusive first look at Taylor Swift in CATS. https://t.co/lDfD3ANu4A— Adam B. Vary (@Adam B. Vary)1554318402.0
Me when I find out the cats in Tom Hooper's cats are the size of actual cats. https://t.co/deZ8BUwm73— Louis All Is Calm, All Is Bright-zman (@Louis All Is Calm, All Is Bright-zman)1554318083.0
Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go call everyone I have ever known and tell them everything about this movie. Bye!